Moving away from your support system is scary. Just like relationships, long-distance friendships are complicated. You are transitioning from seeing someone nearly every day to late-night Skype calls, and that can be tough to swallow. However, some research shows true friendships aren’t fragile; they’re flexible. With that in mind, here are a few ways to make maintaining a remote friendship that much easier. Check them out before you start looking for cross-country movers to relocate your household.
The Nature of Long-Distance Friendships
True friendship is rewarding and challenging, mainly because it continually calls us out of ourselves. If you’re moving out of state, you might be worried if your cherished bond will survive the separation. If it is characterized by support, reciprocity, and intimacy – finding a schedule that works for both of you and sticking to it shouldn’t be that hard.
The very nature of long-distance friendships can bring a lot of pressure, especially if you’re not communicating things clearly. Busy schedules and time difference issues clash and lead to conflicts. Even the most stable and long-lasting companionships could be at risk of dying due to distance.
Particular Challenges of Remote Friendships
Everyone knows that long-distance friendships involve a lot of hard work, but what does that mean, exactly? Have you heard about these most common problems?
- Financial strain related to travel
- High expectations during face-to-face meetings
- Negotiating about the calling schedule
- Negotiating boundaries
- Having more extreme emotions about the friendship, like anger or jealousy
Start Communicating Your Expectations
The best way to start is to be clear about your limits and schedule, giving your friend a clear idea of your expectations. It is crucial to talk this part through carefully, just so there’s no misunderstanding or conflicts in the future. By now, the circle of your closest friends probably know if you tend to be off the radar sometimes, and how to communicate with you during this time. If you have not been separated yet, you must communicate when you’re available to reach out and keep the friendship alive.
Distance Creates New Experiences to Talk About
It may be hard in the beginning, but soon you’ll realize that you have a lot more to talk about. You will have much more to tell each other about what happened since you last spoke, resulting in long-awaited daily calls. Living in close proximity to each other means sharing those events, but you most certainly can convey it on a video call. Remember, being in constant vicinity can result in two overly attached friends and boring conversations.
Time Differences Can Help
With more tools to stay in touch at our fingertips, it shouldn’t be that hard to line up time zones and your schedules. When you think about it, the six-hour difference is more convenient than it is hard to follow. This allows you to have a fixed schedule in line with the time difference and your work/home schedule. Get in touch after you get home after work or before theirs, and make sure to send texts frequently and regularly. Setting call dates will ensure more consistent communication, and it can easily be adjusted to your schedule while you’re unpacking after the move.
Start Cultivating Routines With Your Long-Distance Friend
In the beginning, it will be easy to keep in touch with old friends without much hassle of scheduling quality time. With time and great distances between them, people tend to pay little attention to the dearest friends and eventually grow apart, so make sure to maintain at least one routine with your pal. Remember, the more things you share and can do together, the more often you’ll be able to see each other.
Talk About Your New Friends and Be There When It Counts
It is normal to feel like your friendship is fading when you start making friends in a new state and spending more time with them than on your scheduled calls, and they start doing the same. Use that negative feeling as a motivation to deepen your connection and be more sure of your friendship. Your friend might be able to help you meet new neighbors in your neighborhood by offering advice. In return, you can show interest in their new social circle and everything else going on in their life.
Pick a Random Holiday and Meet Up on That Date
Remember playdates? Getting together with a dear friend over ice cream or coffee resembles getting together and playing pretend a whole lot. Pick a random date or a holiday; give it an unusual name, and turn it into a yearly tradition.
Acknowledge the Efforts Made for Your Friendship
It is expected that one friend will sometimes be putting in more effort than the other, but this is why it is essential to be mindful of all the attempts you’ve made so far to stay connected. Let your friend know how much this friendship means to you, and tell them how thankful you feel for them checking in so often.
To make the transition easier, do some of the research and find a reliable cross-country moving company to provide you with packing and moving services that will make stress-free moving to the new city possible. When you are all packed and ready to go, remember one thing – when far away, people just want to know they are loved and thought of. Ultimately, an involved friend is what matters, no matter how far away.
